Rich Folks have used me for the Sake of Networking

You know that gut-punch moment when it finally clicks? When you're lying in bed at 2 AM and suddenly realize that "mentor" wasn't actually mentoring you—they were just milking you for everything you had?

Yeah. That feeling.

They picked your brain over lunch. Took your ideas and ran with them. Used your connections like they were browsing through your contact list at a networking buffet. And then? Radio silence the second they got what they needed.

And here's the part that really stings: you were so grateful they even bothered to meet with you. You probably thanked them. Maybe even paid for the coffee.

If your stomach just dropped reading that, welcome to the club. The "I've been played" club. Membership is unfortunately huge.

The Networking Lie Everyone's Selling

Look, we've all heard the mantras. "Your network is your net worth." "Surround yourself with successful people." "Get a mentor who's already where you want to be."

So we do exactly that. We chase rich, successful people like we're collecting Pokémon cards, thinking that if we just stand close enough to success, some of it will magically transfer to us through osmosis or whatever.

But here's the thing nobody tells you: when you show up to every networking situation acting like you have nothing to offer, you become a vending machine. And people will keep hitting buttons until you're empty.

You're not networking at that point. You're just... there. Available. Ready to give away your ideas, your time, your connections, your energy—all for the low, low price of feeling like you're "in the room" with important people.

And trust me, they can smell it. That desperation. That eagerness to please. That willingness to give everything for free because you think that's how you "pay your dues."

That Unworthiness Thing We Don't Talk About

Can we be real for a second?

The reason we let people use us isn't that we're stupid. It's because deep down, we don't think we're worth more than that.

I used to walk into rooms with successful people and immediately shrink. Like, physically make myself smaller. I'd start every sentence with "I don't know if this makes sense, but..." or "This is probably dumb, but..." I basically handed them a permission slip to dismiss everything I said.

And you know what happened? They took it.

I gave away my best ideas for free, wrapped in self-deprecation and apologies. Then I'd watch those same ideas show up in someone's product launch six months later. No credit. No compensation. Not even a heads up.

The worst part? I told myself I should be grateful they even listened.

This is the trap: thinking that being used is somehow the cost of entry. That you have to prove you're worth investing in by giving everything away first. That access to successful people is more valuable than protecting your own value.

Spoiler alert: it's not.

How You're Killing Your Own Confidence

Here's something that took me way too long to figure out: every time you undervalue yourself in a networking situation, you're not just losing that one opportunity. You're literally training your brain to believe you're worthless.

Think about it. When you constantly give away your best work, your ideas, your time, your connections—and get nothing back except maybe a "thanks, this was helpful"—what message are you sending yourself?

You're basically running a training program called "How to Believe You Suck 101."

I used to think these successful people saw potential in me that I couldn't see in myself. Like they were going to unlock some hidden greatness and transform my life.

Nope. They saw someone who didn't know their own value. And they saw an opportunity.

When you don't believe in what you bring to the table, you accept scraps. You celebrate just being in the room without asking what you're actually getting from being there. You confuse access with progress.

Meanwhile, you're basically running a free consulting service for people who should be paying you thousands of dollars for your insights.

The people worth knowing? They don't do this. They build real, reciprocal relationships with people they respect. If someone's comfortable draining you dry, that tells you everything about whether they're actually worth your time.

Plot Twist: Your "Mentor" is Now Your Competition

Want to hear something that'll really make your blood boil?

Sometimes the people you think are helping you are actually just doing reconnaissance.

I had this mentor once. Super successful, seemed genuinely interested in helping me grow, gave great advice. I told them everything. My entire business strategy, my target clients, my unique approach, my pricing model, the contacts I'd spent years building.

Because that's what you do with a mentor, right? You trust them. You're vulnerable. You show them your whole hand so they can help you play it better.

Six months later, they launched a competing business. Same niche. Same target market. Same positioning. They even reached out to contacts I'd introduced them to.

When I confronted them, you know what they said? "Hey, it's just business. No hard feelings."

No hard feelings?

Here's what I learned: in the world of business, everyone is a potential competitor. That person asking you really detailed questions about your strategy might not be trying to help you refine it—they might be trying to copy it.

The person you're spilling all your secrets to over coffee? They might be taking notes for their own playbook.

This doesn't mean you should be paranoid about everyone. But it does mean you need to be smarter about who you trust with your good stuff. Ask yourself: "Is this person actually investing in me, or are they just extracting information?"

Real mentors celebrate your wins. They don't see your success as a threat. They don't take your ideas and turn them into their next product launch.

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• The 15 hidden money blocks that intelligent people miss

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• Why do effort and struggle keep you poor energetically

• The identity conflict that silently cancels income growth

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Once you see the pattern, you can’t unsee it.

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Fair warning: This isn't motivational. It's confrontational. It won't make you feel good. It'll make you feel exposed. But if you do the work? Everything changes. Still hesitating?

What You Actually Deserve (No, Really)

If you're angry right now—good. Stay angry for a minute. Because that anger is telling you something important: you've been accepting less than you deserve, and some part of you knows it.

You deserve networking relationships where both people bring value. Where your time isn't treated like it's infinite and free. Where your ideas don't get borrowed without credit. Where the whole point is mutual elevation, not one person climbing on the other's back.

You deserve to walk into rooms knowing you're not there to audition. You're there as an equal. You have skills, insights, and connections that others need. They should feel lucky to access you, not the other way around.

You deserve mentors who actually give a damn about your success. Who isn't secretly planning to compete with you? Who celebrates when you win instead of getting weird about it?

The Hard Truth Nobody Wants to Hear

Those rich folks who used you? It's not entirely their fault.

I know, I know. Stay with me.

They used you because you let them. Because you showed up acting like you had nothing to offer. Because you assigned yourself so little value that they just... agreed with you.

People will treat you the way you treat yourself. If you act like your time is worthless, they'll waste it. If you act like your ideas are free, they'll take them. If you act like you should be grateful for their attention, they'll give you the bare minimum and expect applause.

Stop giving yourself away just to be in the room.

Stop treating proximity to wealth like it's more valuable than your own expertise. Stop confusing networking with begging. Stop acting like you need permission to be valuable.

You have value right now. Today. Not after you've "proven yourself" or "paid your dues" or whatever other BS excuse you've been telling yourself.

The second you start believing that—I mean, really believing it—is the second you stop being a resource people extract from and start being a person they collaborate with.

And that's when everything shifts.

You stop attracting users and start attracting real partners. You stop getting played and start getting paid. You stop feeling like you're always chasing and start feeling like you're choosing.

So yeah. Be angry. Be indignant. Feel that frustration.

Then decide you're done being anyone's free vending machine.

You're worth more than that. Always have been.

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